When my ex (we were not married) decided that she wasn’t happy living with me and that she wanted to become an independent woman, she up and left and took our 3 year old daughter with her. At first she didn’t ask for any money, but after a few months out there in the big world by herself she came back asking for some CS. I asked her what chance would she ever have of becoming an independent self assured modern feminist woman if she had to hang on to her old boyfriends purse strings?
I gave her the money she asked for on a monthly basis. Non court ordered. She was having a difficult time, I felt sorry for her, plus I was very concerned about our little girl. Life is not easy for a single mom with little money trying to get established. Life for them revolves around work, then home to care for the child then back to work again. No time off with her girlfriends while dad takes care of the child. No money for baby-sitters.
Since my ex moved to another state I did not get to see my daughter as much as I would like. I missed her very much and still do miss her very much today.
While my ex was having a hard time, life without her for me became pure joy. I was free again. I could play golf and tennis all weekend. I could watch as much sport on TV until it ran out my ears. No need to get permission from her to go out to the workshop for a few hours tinkering with my vintage motorcycles. A few beers in hand and out I go. Nobody complaining in my ear all day and night. FREE AT LAST!. I live life as I please.
Life, for me improved the very day she walked out. That evening this gorgeous young woman from my tennis club came over to see me and stayed the night! Women’s intuition told her that my ex had left that morning. It was time for her to make that long awaited move to jump my hairy body. Guys, don’t you just love them! Women are just wonderful. Incredible intuition! I love women, never met one I didn't like.
Women’s intuition also told my ex about my new lifestyle, she became very angry. Her anger grew and grew as quickly as her weight. I never did do anything wrong, I think just being a male and having a jumpy penis was my big problem. She started asking me for more child support and began to stop me from seeing our little girl. It was like she wanted me to pay her more child-support just because I was getting laid by hot young babes. What kind of a deal is that. I thought that she was being very cruel to our daughter who waits for my visits and constantly talks about her daddy.
Finally, I was handed a summons to appear in family court. I know that her girlfriends visited her regulary, she told me that they'd informd her that if she took me to court she'd get a lot more in child-support than what I was presently paying her. Fathers don't stand a chance in family court, they told her. My ex wanted the child support doubled, plus full legal and physical custody of our daughter. It was as if she felt she deserved everything because she was a woman and wanted payment for the pain she'd gone throuigh during child-birth. I was also put on a restraining order not to visit my daughter until after the court case, which was 3 months away. I thought this was very cruel to a little girl, to stop her from seeing her daddy. Why must family court punish little children? My lawyer told me that everything is done in the best interests of the child. Yeah sure. I had never hurt or threatened anyone, let alone my ex or our little girl. My ex said she had a good lawyer who was going to get every cent he could out of me.
When the court day came, the judge awarded her full “ownership” of our daughter but made no changes in the amount of child support I was paying. No set visitation was written into the court order . I was made to pay all court costs. Plus I was put on a restraining order for another 2 years. I was given no rights nor was my daughter, Mom was given full control of the situation. I was now just a checkbook and couldn't have visitation with my little girl.
Believe it or not, I have always been a feminist. Guys can be feminists can’t they?. I’m still a feminist even after being dragged through family court. A lot of guys turn the other direction after family court. Not me, I still believe women are the best thing god ever created ;-)
I believe men have really put women
down since day one. Men treat women as baby makers and their own personal
unpaid house slaves, believing that women are only capable of making
babies, cleaning, cooking and shopping. I’m a white heterosexual male, the
worst of the species for keeping women as men’s slaves.
I actually have a friend who admitted to me that he really only got married
because he needed a mother. Someone to cook him dinner, wash his clothes,
clean his apartment. He would have liked to do all the work himself but
didn't know how. So he just got married, problem solved. He said that he
didn't really love his wife like he thought that he supposed to love her. He
said that he loved her the same way he loved his mother. Sex with her (his
wife) has never been fantastic, but he's always getting laid with other hot
babes. He said, his wife still thinks he married her for sex, if she only
knew he just wanted a mother. Does this little story remind us a
little of ourselves?
Women are more capable than men, look at some of the great stateswomen, Margaret Thatcher and Hilary Rodham-Clinton. They are my heroines. If the burden of raising children during the best years of a woman’s life could be placed with men, women would soon control the world like men do now. How often do you see famous and powerful women looking after their kids. Never, they force husbands to help, like god intended, they are powerful women who don’t want to spend the best years of their lives wiping kids butts. They want interesting and varied lives as I think most women do.
When men go to a prostitute for sex they pay her not for sex , but for her to go away when they have finished. Men do this with their ex-wives. With the old, ex wife looking after the kids full time, men go free, to play golf, have sex with other woman, do whatever they want. Meanwhile they know that their ex is at home washing floors, changing diapers, working to raise HIS children, by herself. Men enslave women.
I started to feel guilty about my new, single, no responsibility, lifestyle and the fact that my ex will be raising our daughter all by herself for the next 15 or more years. She was now earning a very good living . Finances were not a problem. My CS payments had become icing on the cake. She was fast becoming the independent woman she left me to become. If that makes her happy, I’m happy for her.
Since I’m a feminist I offered to be the CP for our daughter from the time she turns 12 or 13 years onward. Our daughter would spend equal time with Mum and Dad. Mum would be the CP in the nurturing years while dad would get the more expensive teen/college years. When our daughter lives with me mom would get the chance to pursue her career, travel, start a new relationship She could then chase the lifestyle a worldly woman of her age would want to do. Our daughter would also get the chance to, live with, know and love both her parents to the fullest. She would know that her Dad never tried to evade his parental responsibilities, that he loves her and cares for her. I suggested that since I wanted to do equal work in raising our daughter, that I will pay equal expenses. I would stop paying her CS and in return, I would not ask for money from her when I’m the CP. Nope, she wanted to keep me as a checkbook and "own" our daughter. I begged her to consider my equal parenting plan.
She got very angry and stopped me from seeing my daughter. I said no honey, no money. She got more angry when I stopped paying CS. I have started getting letters from the DA. I plan to send them a copy of this letter, hoping they will understand the type of guy I am. A very responsible father, feminist and lesbian with a penis. Fighting for rights and equality for women and children If they need to put me in jail as they are threatening to do. That’s OK. All I ask for is a nice cell, good bed, 3 meals a day, cable TV and a fast internet connection.
HOW FATHERS CAN HELP IN THIS FATHERLESS SOCIETY.
1. Join N.O.W. and tell them you apologize for being born a male and that you plan to be a real practicing father and not pay your ex wife to raise your children while you go out enjoy life and impregnate more women.
2. Stop paying child support and get in there and change some diapers for a change, and let your wife or ex-wife go on that business trip to the Bahamas that you were planning going on.
3. Encourage women that they are the stronger sex. That they should run the world. That they should have all the good jobs. And that the only thing men are good for is sex and playing golf.
4.
Encourage other men not to pay CS. Find and publish (on this
newsgroup) ways for men to avoid paying sexist and demeaning CS.
HOW MOTHERS CAN HELP
5. Tell your children’s father that you don’t want their filthy capitalist CS money and refuse to cash their child support checks. If the DA sends you CS money, send it back..
6. Tell the fathers of the world that you want them to spend equal time with their kids so that mothers can have some life apart from their children. So they can go to the beauty parlor, the theatre, ballet, restaurants, movies, coffee with girlfriends, meet nice men, get laid - ENJOY LIFE instead of changing diapers all day.
7. Write and tell the family court that they are reducing women to just baby makers, minders and cleaners by allowing men to shirk on being real fathers by just giving moms a few miserable bucks called child-support.
8. Go back to court and get joint custody. Make men be fathers not just checkbooks.